The Perfect Christmas Gifts
by Lady Priscilla Violet Regina
Summary: Rated for VERY mild language...Heero decides to buy Christmas gifts for everyone. Uh...that's all I can say, or it'll be given away! It has a bit of Heero OOC, but only because he expresses himself a bit more than normal and also has a great sense of humo
1. Parts 1 and 2

The Perfect Christmas Gifts

By: Priscilla Violet Regina, the GW fic writer you all know and love! ~.ó

Disclaimer: Wouldn't it be awesome if I owned the Barbie with the Karate Gi? That would be so cool! But, I don't...or the pilots and/or other people (and I use that term loosely) mentioned in the this Lil ficcy of mine...Hey it's a fic-chan!

Warning: NO YAOI/SHONEN AI/SLASH WHATSOEVER! (Is that a warning? ~.ó) Go Jen-chan! Those types of plots have been working their way more and more into my stories...I swear...it's an epidemic! But that's okay...I've been told I write Yaoi well...But now I'm babbling and probably losing your interest to read my story...and that's not good! NO!! DON'T GO!!! Read on, noble...reader...^_^;;

Oh, also...Heero is a bit...OOC...at least in my eyes. I could have portrayed him better, but...in this he has a dry sense of humor that I enjoy...hehe ~.ó

Part 1

Mission status: Accepted, beginning

Christmas was tomorrow. Heero still hadn't bought anything. Grabbing his coat and keys, he headed out to his Jeep, deciding to buy Christmas presents. For the first time.

You heard right. Heero had never bout Christmas presents once in his life. He had never felt the need to. Most of the time, Christmas came and went without so much as a single reminder for him.

But now, he had a reason. Quatre was having a party tomorrow. Everyone would be there. Even Relena. He had heard Miliardo was going to make a cameo; he had gone into hiding since Mariemaia. Once again.

And, after watching "It's a Wonder Life," "The Christmas Story,' and "The Night Before Christmas" on a family channel, he was informed of the fact that people gave gifts to the ones they loved on Christmas.

So, he decided to comply.

There was just one problem.

He didn't know what to buy.

He knew Relena would probably love anything he bought her, seeing as how she took his vicious threats and _Omae o Korosu's_ as exclamations of love, so he decided not to worry about her give right now.

Arriving at an all night strip mall, he parked his car and moved out into the artificial snow the Colony weather people had created for the season.

Stepping into the fluorescently lit store, Heero blinking, drinking all of its contents in and analyzing the layout of the store. He started down row one; perfumes and beauty products. 'Relena smells and looks fine. Duo, however...' Smiling at the mental image of Duo done in drag Queen, Heero continued down to row 2; camping equipment. 'They put the perfume and cosmetics next to the camping equipment? How inefficient.'

Annoyed, he skipped up a couple rows and saw a pink hairbrush. An eyebrow rose. Then, the other. Next to it was a box of pink barrettes and rubber bands. Evil smirk tugging viciously at the Japanese boy's lips, he grabbed these items and placed them in a basket. Heading further down the row, Heero saw a Barbie doll with a Karate Gi on. Tossing it in the basket, he smiled. 'I have Duo and Wufei taken care of!'

Still searching, Heero tried to think of the best gift for Trowa. Eyebrows knitting in thought, his eyes scanned the shelves, hoping for an idea. And he found his inspiration quickly. Seizing a megaphone, he checked all the features that came with it. Holding back a laugh, Heero continued, thinking of Quatre.

Sighing, he scowled. Quatre. What the hell could he buy Quatre?

A thought hit him. He bought Wufei a Barbie, so why not buy Quatre a...

GI-JOE!

Smirking at the idea of Quatre playing with a GI-JOE, he couldn't resist. Throwing it on top of the other gag gifts, he went to look for a present for Miliardo.

"Ugh. I'm buying a Christmas present for Zechs."

Completely stumped, he searched endlessly up and down the rows, not finding anything. "I'm definitely not the Perfect Gift-giver..." he muttered, almost ready to give up. Then, he reached the video tape section. Spotting a few Yoga taps, an idea flitted across the depths of his twisted mind. "_Be One With Yourself_, ne? Perfect."

Now, on to Relena.

Heero sighed. The girl had won his heart, what else did she want? A paradox. He was even more stumped than when he was deciding on her brother. 'And I thought she was going to be easy...'

Passing a ring maker, Heero paused. A ring? Walking up to the man, he stared down, Prussian blue eyes scanning and analyzing his every feature. "How much?"

"Depends on the ring."

"Do you engrave?"

"Sure, for extra." Looking over the jewelry, Heero's eye was caught by a simple gold band with a single diamond set in the center. Asking the man if he could see it, he looked a the size, seeing it was correct. 

"Perfect." he muttered under his breath, turning it over and analyzing it in the light. "I want this one. Carve on the inside--"

"Whoa, are you sure you can pay for this, kid?"

The Japanese boy glared at the seller, eyes narrowing to dangerous slits. "Of course. Now, on the inside, I want you to carve this: Omae O Korosu. I'll write it down for you."

The man frowned. "What's this gibberish?"

'This guy continually reminds me of the reason I hate Americans...' 

"It is Japanese. It says, 'I will kill you.' Now carve, please!"

"Alright, whatever, I'll be done in a few."

After having bought his other gifts plus some wrapping paper and bows, Heero returned to the man, glaring at him until he noticed his presence. Dropping his sandwich, the man hastily said, "It comes to $1,693.57. How will you be paying?" while placing the finished ring in a black case.

"Let me see the ring first."

The ring seller frowned. "You know, if you were my son I'd never let you talk like that. You should show some respect for your elders and betters..."

Heero looked straight into the man's eyes. "If I had respect for you or thought of you were better than me, I wouldn't talk like this. But, then again, I don't. Gomen." he said lightly, taking the ring case from the shocked man. Making sure the inscription was correct, Heero paid the man and headed home.

Part 2

Mission status: Complete, waiting for signal

"I miss the snow on Earth. I'll have to go home next year for the Christmas and visit the old osen." Heero made a mental note.

When he arrived at his apartment, he started to write out the cards to go with each gift. First, he grabbed a cad for Duo. It had some nonsense about having a wonderful holiday, which Heero smirked at. Grabbing a pen, he started to write his message.

_Duo...what can I say? You are very loud and normally obnoxious, but a good person to have bail me out of an Oz research facility. Even if I plunge to my almost death unconsciously. Anytime I've needed you, you've been there. Hope one day I can repay the favor. You have reminded me of what it's like to have a sense of humor. For that, Arigato...I think. Enjoy gift; I spent a lot of thought on it._

-Heero

Rereading his note, Heero scowled. 'Am I growing soft?' Reaching for another card, he decided to write out Trowa's.

__

Trowa...

'Trowa...what can I write in Trowa's? I barely know him...'

_I know we didn't really talk, but...maybe this gift can help. Merry Christmas, or whatever._

-Heero

"Hn. That was simple enough...on to Quatre."

_Quatre-sama:_

How you became a Gundam Pilot, I'll never know. I thought we all had to be ruthless killing machines to succeed. But having you in the group evened us out. You also kept us together, but from killing each other. You were definitely the brains behind us. Have a

Heero smirked. "I am going soft..."

__

wonderful Christmas. 

-Heero

Sighing, he looked at the bag on the table containing all of the gifts. 'Who do I have left? Oh, right...Wufei, Zechs, and Relena.' he grimaced at this thought knowing these to be the hardest. "Wufei doesn't need a card...he'll get the message easy enough...I should still write one, though...Kuso."

Once again arming himself...with a pen, Heero grabbed another card, opening it. All he wrote was this:

_Fei-_

Don't say Injustice when you open this gift. I might have to shoot you.

-Heero

Taking sip from the vodka tumbler he had nearby, Heero cleared his throat, dreading the last two cards.

_Zechs-_

Maybe this will help you with your problem...

To mask, or not to mask.

That is the question.

-Heero

Chuckling at his sarcasm, the Japanese boy grabbed the last card. "Relena..." Rolling his eyes, he rubbed his temples, clearing his head. Why did he buy her a ring? Did he actually want to...

Hastily writing her card out, he wrapped each gift carefully and attached the notes with ribbon, sighing. 

"Finally it's done."

Heading to bed, he fell asleep, dreaming of the possible outcome the next day would bring.


	2. Part 3

Part 3

Mission status: Accomplished

"Miss Relena, you look so elegant!" the blonde greeted, kissing the girl's cheek as he took her coat. She smiled, but her attention was obviously diverted as her eyes scanned the room for a certain boy. Quatre saw this and chuckled, whispering, "Heero's not here yet, Miss Relena. I'll have someone inform you when he arrives, if you would like..."

Nodding, Relena smiled again. "Thank you, Quatre. Who else is here?"

"Oh, many people. Most everyone except Heero and your brother. Feel free to make yourself at home!"

Relena made her way through the expansive house, notably admiring the beautiful paintings and detailed artwork. "Amazing, isn't it?" a raspy voice asked behind her while she analyzed a painting by Monet.

"Why yes, dear brother it is amazing. I've always loved Monet." She turned to face Miliardo, who grinned classically at her acknowledgement of him by voice. Hugging him, she noticed Heero enter the foyer, being greeted by Quatre. Their eyes locked as he conversed with Quatre, then moved to place a bag on the gift table.

"Sister, are you paying attention?" the former Oz colonel asked, blue eyes shining in the surrounding candlelight.

She smiled, watching Duo pull Heero off tot he food table, chattering away animatedly, as always. "Hm, yes? Of course I am, Miliardo, please continue..." 

"Oh, well, anyway, when I was studying at..."

~*~

"So, Heero, where ya been, buddy?" Duo asked, grabbing the Pilot's arm. Receiving the patented death glare, Duo chuckled, grinning blindingly. "Aw, come on, you're not still mad about that little joke, are you? Pink's a good color on you, and besides, the hair dye came out after few weeks, didn't it?" He poked the Japanese boy in the side, then offered him a bit of whatever food item he was consuming at the moment.

Heero shook his head with a "Hn." and walked with the braided one, nodding acknowledgement to Trowa and Wufei as he sat down between Hilde and Catherine, who promptly hugged him and asked how he was doing. Their incessant babble was drowned out instantly as Heero watched Relena walk towards their group, arm through her brother's and sit down on a cough opposite him. Her violet eyes sparkled as she listened to Hilde go on about the new house her and duo were buying, explaining every little detail.

When everyone had arrived, Quatre approached the group with a warm smile. "Would everyone like to exchange gifts?" Seeing Heero's startled face, he added, "If you didn't bring gifts, or only brought some for certain people, that's fine...we understand! Who would like to go first?"

Duo, a devilish grin on his face and twinkle in his eye, kicked Heero under the coffee table, causing him to stand up and glare at the offender, reaching for his gun. But, Quatre cut him off, shouting excitedly, "Oh, great, Heero! Thanks for volunteering!" and leading him to the gift table.

By the time Heero realized what was happening, he was already back at the group, passing out gifts. Plopping down next to Relena, who gasped and jumped slightly, Heero watched as everyone started to open his gifts to them. "Wait!" shouted Quatre. "Read the cards, out loud please, and one at a time, so I can get pictures!"

Duo stood up proudly. "I'll go first!" Ripping open his card, he read its contents out loud, narrowing his eyes at the 'loud and obnoxious' statement, but grinning the whole time anyway. Pulling off the wrapping paper, his excitement quickly died down as he analyzed what Heero had bought him. "PINK?!" was all he managed to sputter out, mouth dropping at he looked at his new hair set.

The rest of the group burst out in laughter, minus Heero, Trowa, and Relena. Trowa and Heero for obvious reasons...Relena, on the other hand, was still perplexed about the fact that Heero chose and willingly sat next to her. 'What does he have up his sleeve?' she wondered, watching Trowa open his gift. He had Quatre read his card, though, and smirked at Heero's dry humor. Duo was thoroughly amused, and, after giving his giving his gift to Hilde, proceeded to play with and test all of the features on the megaphone, until Trowa was forced to take it from him and hide it under a seat cushion.

Quatre chuckled, then started to open his gift. "Why, thank you so much, Heero, that card is lovely. I'll have to hang it on the tree with the others..." he gestured towards his fifteen foot tall pine in the corner of the room, reaching up to the second floor, which was covered in cards already. Duo's eyes bulged.

"Where did you get all those cards, Q?"

The blonde shrugged modestly. "Well, when you have twenty-nine older sisters, and a team of forty Maguanacs as friends...you get a lot of Christmas cards. You should see my birthday..." He then began to extricate his gift from the carefully attached wrapping paper, and frowned momentarily.

"What is it?" Hilde asked, leaning over for a better view.

"It's a..." he smirked, pulling the gift free. "GI-Joe. Thank you, Heero...I never knew you had such a sense of...humor. It will be one of the toys I keep under lock and key when this house is finally filled with the sound of children again. Arigato."

Heero nodded response, then looked to Wufei, who had started opening his card. "Uh, Q-sama? Where's the...restroom?"

The blonde laughed. "Wait, Wufei is opening his gift!"

The Japanese boy nodded, sighing and slumping down in his seat. "I know."

Wufei looked towards the former pilot of Wing Zero, frowning. "Yuy...why..." he began, glaring dangerously at the other Oriental.

Heero just glared back, face impassive and no response given. The Chinese boy began opening his Christmas present, eyeing him warily, but as soon as he saw the pretty pink name scrolled across the box top which has given so many young girls hours of entertainment, he stood up abruptly, knocking the gift to the floor. "In--" But before he could get the word out, Heero's gun was in his palm, barrel aiming straight for Wufei's head.

"I warned you."

Quatre got the worried look he always got when breaking up a fight between pilots, and made his way between them, Wufei's hand on his sword, Heero's...well, we know where Heero's hand was. "Guys, come on...it's Christmas! The holiday of love, compassion, friendship..." He stressed the word 'friendship while glaring at both of them. "And you know my rule...no fighting in the house!" Quatre reminded them gently, sounding like he was scolding two children.

Heero slowly lowered the hand holding his gun, and Wufei sat down, picking up the gift. Quatre walked closer to Heero, stretching out his hand, palm flat. "Give me your gun, Heero."

The boy's Prussian blue eyes flicked dangerously from Wufei to Quatre, Quatre to Wufei, until he finally submitted, dropping his weapon into Quatre's hand with a growled, "Hn." before taking his seat again next to Relena.

The girl he was comfortably in close proximity to was completely confused. The first surprise came from the fact that Heero had actually shown up at this party. She didn't think anyone suspected that. Then, she noticed he had brought gifts with him...

And now, all of them were...funny? Gag gifts? From...Heero Yuy?

Why was he acting like this?

Unfortunately, her thought process was interrupted as she heard the object of her ponderings clears his throat. She turned towards him, expecting the worst, and accepted his gift. The box containing her present was huge...

'What could be in it? I don't remember seeing him bring this one in...'

She smiled briefly, looking deep into his royal blue eyes.

"Thank you, Heero."

'I should smile back...right? Yes, dumb-ass, smile back!' Heero's thoughts battled, until he finally managed a quick grin and looked away, heart slamming rapidly against his chest as he anticipated her response to his card and the gift he had given her.

"Uh, Heero?" she tugged on his sleeve, bringing him back to reality. "What does this say? I can't read Japanese..."

His eyes widened. He hadn't thought of that. "You...can't?" he gulped visibly, much to the surprise of the surrounding pilots and friends.

"But I can!" Duo exclaimed, leaping forward and snatching the card from the former Queen's hands before Heero could return from his slight anxiety attack and retrieve it. "Hmm...it's been a while since I've read Japanese, you'll have to give me a moment..."

Heero growled dangerously, pouncing on Duo. "Baka, give that to me!"

"Hey, I know what that means...and it's not very nice, Heero!" Duo shouted while squirming in Heero's grasp, trying to get away. Struggling to keep the card from the now infuriated Japanese boy, Duo read aloud, "Ai shiteru...hmm...Ai means love, and...aahh!!!"

Finally, Heero succeeded in getting his card back and walked towards Relena, clothing slightly ruffled and hair tousled a bit more than normal. "Here you go, tenshi..." he said with surprising gentleness. 

Relena's brother's eyes widened visibly. 'Tenshi? But that means...angel!' he narrowed his eyes, glaring at Heero, who once again took his seat next to Relena. "Yuy, I don't know what you're up to but..."

"Brother? You know Japanese, right? Can you read this to me?"

Miliardo grinned. "Why, certainly, Lena..."

"Relena, I'll read it to you."

The said girl looked up at this, violet eyes shimmering. She quickly withdrew her outstretched arm before her brother could take the card, and handed it to Heero, who stood before her. "I'd like that, Heero." Her brother scowled, leaning back on the plush couch cushion, and watched Heero, who fidgeted visibly.

The boy began nervously, using the monotone he was known for. "I don't need the card. I know what it says. It's hard to say some of it in English because I used a few terms that aren't able to be translated into English. That's why it's in Japanese. I'll try my best though. 

_Relena..._

I love you. As hard to understand as that may be, I do. You have changed my life in a way no one ever could. I thank you for that. You are" he paused, hearing the many gasps from the other guests. "And then it compares you to many sacred Japanese things and ideas...basically..._You are native among angels_. It ends with _Will you be my angel?_"

He stopped, dropping to one knee while reaching into a hidden door in the box, and produced a small, black case. He grabbed for her hand and stared up through his unruly bangs, opening the ring case.

At first, Relena was in a state of shock, staring at him like he was insane. Then, suddenly, her eyes widened immensely, then filled with tears as she admired the ring. Immediately, Heero found himself in her arms and the receiver of many firmly planted kisses of acceptance.

While all this had been going on, Miliardo decided to open his present, not one for all this mushy stuff. 'To mask or not to mask? What the hell?' he wondered, opening the small box containing his present. 'YOGA? _Be One With Yourself_?'

"Yuy!? What the hell is this?" he exclaimed, turning to face the newly engaged Gundam Pilot, still in Relena's arms.

Duo smiled, walking towards the enraged man. "I think Heero's trying to send you a hint, buddy..."

Heero, however, was too caught up in the attention he was receiving from his fiancée to even hear Miliardo's shouts. All he heard was Relena's voice, whispering softly in his ear, "Yes, I'll be your angel. Always."

-Owari

What do you think? If you must flame...do it properly, alright? If you have problems with OOC and read this anyway...I warned you! I'll just laugh in your face if you complain about it! If you liked it...review! If you didn't...review! Looks like you have no choice...you must review! *adopts Scary Jedi Voice (TM)* You **_will_** review...

Duo: But what if they don't want to review?

Jen-chan: *narrows eyes* They have no choice! I used the Scary Jedi Voice (TM)! They HAVE to now!!

Duo: *sweatdrop* Scary Jedi Voice (TM)? thoughts: Why do we keep adding that (TM) thing?

Jen-chan: Haven't you heard of the Scary Jedi Voice (TM)? 

Duo: Nooooooo.......*raised eyebrow*

Jen-chan: *facefaults* YOU HAVEN'T SEEN STAR WARS???

Duo: Star Wars?

Jen-chan: OMG!!! Off we go to watch every Star Wars movie ever made! *grabs popcorn and drinks* Talk to you later! It's a Star Wars marathon!!!!! 

Duo: Why do I have a sudden urge to run away?

Jen-chan: Hey, that reminds me of another classic movie...Monty Python and the--

Duo: Let's just watch one movie at a time, okay?

Jen-chan: *nods enthusiastically* OKAY!!! *grabs his braid and runs off*


End file.
